Dr. Rich Patterson

Rich Patterson, Ph.D.


When a pilot is approaching a runway to land a plane, they receive Feedback from the control tower telling them which runway to land on and a bit about the weather, maybe something about wind shear and the like.  It is critical information, and the pilot would have a much more difficult time landing the plane without that vital information.  We all receive Feedback in our lives, but we often don’t pay enough attention to it to make those changes.

This Feedback can be information you observe about your environment–school, home life, family, parents, step-parents, grandparents, or foster parents.  It can be in the form of Feedback or criticism you receive from adult sources, such as family, school, friends.  It is general information that you may have noticed before about yourself.  For example, if your friends see that you tend to kid around and joke in a manner that makes them angry, your Feedback might be that this is something you need to improve about yourself.

Another area of consideration is relationships.  Some individuals seem to have solid, healthy relationships, created easily.  Some just work on relationships, and others would rather avoid them as much as possible.  Which description fits your lifestyle and personality?  We can ask ourselves if we need better skills in this area by noticing the Feedback we receive or having a pretty good balance that fits who we are now.  Please realize that we all change as we live our lives.

Understanding change is essential because if we are not more like the clouds in the sky constantly adjusting, bumping into things, and using that to move in a new direction, we will indeed find life very difficult.

We are not always exactly like we are right now; in fact, you’re changing your thoughts, outlook, and disposition by reading this blog post.  Working with Feedback as it applies to relationships can be one of the most challenging aspects of life, and for many of us, families raise that difficulty so much that we require help and intervention at times.  How can you make an effort to notice the Feedback you’re receiving?  The subtle things that you see about how you interact with others?

What application may it have to make you better as a person?  We are all on a journey and working to be the best we can be and help others.  By working to improve ourselves, we inspire others to do the same.  Enjoy the journey!

A key ingredient to receiving and processing Feedback is Patience.  Read this next post here, Roots, Patience, and Presence – Dr. Rich Patterson (

Giving Feedback is a life skill that everyone should learn.  Read this post about 3 Models for Giving Effective Feedback, Giving Feedback: 3 Models for Giving Effective Feedback (


Yours for Better Parenting,