Dr. Rich Patterson


Send The Message Once

Often when we have a problem or a difficult circumstance we may turn to friends, our faith, or a significant other and ask for help.  Exercising belief is important to teach our kids, and ourselves, to send a message once.  It shows a lack of faith in the person being asked if we continually send the same message.  As a person of faith I have asked in prayer multiple times for something to happen.  Sometimes it will happen and other times not.  Believing in your request, visually seeing it honored and seeing it fulfilled is the next step, not in asking once again.  We can get caught up in this so easily.

If you send a letter, text or email you don’t send it more than once.  If you did, the person would think you were really badgering them.  In working with kids it is important for them to understand this as well.  Teach them that when a reasonable request is made you as a parent, or from a teacher or school administrator, they need to honor it.  Teaching them that they should not have to be asked more than once to do something.  The same for things that they may want, they ask once and as a parent you let them know that you hear them, but that maybe it just isn’t going to happen right now.  It might be a financial decision, scheduling, timing etc.  But then take it to the next step, teach them to believe in what they are asking for.

Sending it once doesn’t mean that you don’t think about it again.  Mentally you can continue to paint the picture of that which you are asking for.  It is something that you add to over and over.  Consider Tami who wanted to go to prom her senior year with a particular type of guy.  Mind you she didn’t know this guy, she visualized him.  Over time, she continued to add to his persona in her mind.  At first it was blonde hair, then his build, then the clothes he would wear, then the type of car and over time she continued to believe that he would appear as she had asked.  One day, she was shopping for some shoes to wear to prom (no date yet).  She went into a store to look at some shoes and she heard a voice say, “Can I help you?”  Without looking up she told him the shoes that she wanted to try on.  When she looked up, here was her visualization (the guy) right in front of her.  From there things unfolded and she went to prom with him.

How can we teach our kids and ourselves to ask once and then to believe so deeply that it simply happens?  Try this out for yourself with something simple and let me know how it works.