Recognize that Attitude Needs Daily Alignment
It is almost as if the human default is damaging if left unattended. Having a good attitude needs daily alignment to benefit you and others. That may well be the motto we can use; I will have a good mood today to help myself and others. By getting in the habit of checking on your general disposition, you will begin to default to the positive when difficulties arise. I think that the ultimate test is during difficult times. How do you act when things aren’t going well?
When are people disagreeing or arguing about something? That is when you take your motto to heart and arise to make a difference.
Look at the photo of the young woman above! You can see her great attitude shining through. I want to thank Vladislav Todorov on Unsplash for this photo because it expresses what others see when we come into the room with a great attitude. I’m not saying that it is easy or that it is automatic. I know a woman who is genuinely always positive no matter what. Even in difficult situations that she may be a part of, she will pause for a moment and then say something positive.
I noticed this was her general mode of operation–truly a genuine piece of her personality. I asked her about it one day, and she replied her grandmother raised her and had taught her to be that way.
What a great gift! We can give that to our kids and remind them that no matter what, other people, circumstances, wants/desires, none of it controls who you are inside and what you choose to display outside. You may be saying, OK, Rich, but that’s easier said than done. Yes, it is, and I have indeed fallen short. But, we can make a difference in our default attitude by practicing our more positive choices during those difficult times.
How do we do this exactly? We choose to think and respond differently. We may be unhappy about a situation, a response from a colleague, or a meeting where we were left out, but we can still choose to be positive. While working with a couple of teenage boys one day in my office as an assistant principal, I reminded them of just that; we have a choice in how we respond. “But, he called me a . . . (fill in the blank)!
So how else am I supposed to respond? I don’t allow anyone to speak to me like that.” I understand, and that is a good standard, but you can still choose to make your point without getting angry. It takes practice and a personal effort to be responsible for our attitude.
Here’s what I know. When we work on having a good attitude, others will notice that there is something different about us. You seem to have leadership qualities that are of benefit in many situations. That you will be the one chosen to be a leader over someone else who might even have more talent than yourself, make the choice today to pull yourself up out of the darkness when you feel like staying there. Make yourself positive, and you will suddenly discover that you feel better and forget what you were ever down about in the first place.
Speaking of Attitude, Gratitude will also help us to raise our consciousness. Read here Attitude of Gratitude – Dr. Rich Patterson (pattersonphd.com)
My alma mater, Northwestern University has an article from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology here, 76_DavisRusbult2001_JournalOfPersonalityAndSocialPsychology.pdf (northwestern.edu)
Yours for a better life,